I Hate It

I hate it because she is cool

I hate it because I’m a fool

I hate it because she’s pretty

I hate it because I’m ugly

I hate it because she is wiser

I hate it because I’m a loser

I hate it because she is happy

I hate it because I am lonely

I hate it because she is charming

I hate it because I’m annoying

I hate it because she loves herself

I hate it because I hate myself

Kaya Ra Ni

Sa lalum ug mangitngit nga kabuntagon

Naghimog linya ang mga buluhaton

Ako naglibog kung unsa ang unahon

Ilabina nga ako pod katulogon

Sa akong paglingi ni mama ug papa

Akong gibuka ang akong mga mata

Nakita nako ang sakripisyo nila

Para lang makatarong ko ug eskuyla

Milingi ko sa akong mga igsuon

Nga andam  mutabang sa akong pagtuon

Nakita ko ang ilang kwartang giipon

Para sa akong maayong kaugmaon

Ug mikalit pagtulo ang akong luha

Tungod sa kalipay nga akong nakuha

Salamat sa Iyang  mga gipakita

Nadasig ko nga dili magpakasala

Ug busa karon dili nako sayangan

Kining higayon para sila mabayran

Ang kalisod tarungon nako ug pas-an

Para sa akong mga igsuon ug ginikanan

My Profiler in TINTA

On my way back to Argao, I could see my reflection on the glass window of the bus. I saw my face wearing eye bags. On that moment, I could only see myself as a stressful college student. Later on, I realized how I missed my family and that’s exactly the reason why I decided to go home. Home is such a wonderful word to consider so I suddenly smiled. I asked my reflection: Who am I before I went to college? My reflection said:

“On the 19^th day of July 1994, Carmen Jonahville Caminade Matarlo was born in Argao Cebu. She is Babydon at home while in school she is Menang. Her favorite color is purple. She loves to watch anime and read manga. She has collections such as cute pens, anime posters, anime magazines, key chains, dictionaries and books. Her favorite author is Alice Sebold who wrote The Lovely Bones. Her daily routine was home-school-church-home. She loves all the people she knows. She loves everything. As you can notice, she’s a happy person. But behind that personality is a person who can’t express her sadness through her voice and so she found poetry as her partner in crime. She started writing in elementary with her first poem Kaligayahan Maging Kalungkutan. She have written 44 poems already and submitted those in devianArt. She loves to see her Sensei (teacher) Pilandok’s evaluation of her works through his comments. She considers each evaluation as an inspiration for improvement. In school, all tasks which involve writing are given to her. And she accepts every task positively. Now I’m asking you: How do you see yourself right now in college?” I told my reflection:

I’m Carmen Jonahville Caminade Matarlo taking up BA Mass Communication in University of the Philippines Cebu. You can’t call me Babydon. You can’t call me Menang. But you must call me Ceejay. My favorite color is still purple. I’m forever will be an Otaku (anime lover). I left my collections in my room at home except for my anime magazines. My daily routine is boarding house-school-boarding house. Though I only go to church every Sunday, I praise God more than anything else every day. I love to observe the people whether they deserve my attention or not. I love almost everything. See the differences? Well, change is the only permanent thing on Earth. But I assure you that my passion for creative writing will never change. The fact that I didn’t hesitate to join TINTA only showed how much I wanted to keep myself as a creative writer.

I’m on my way back to the city and right now, I can see myself not just a college student who wears eye bags but a college student who wears eye bags happily. Writing is one of my happiness.

Now if you think talking to you (my reflection) is a stupid act well I am sorry, I find it creative.  Mabuhay ang mga Creative Iskolars! :D

 

New Chapter

Life in University of the Philippines Cebu is simply fun.


Anyway, they have this trivia that if you'll take a picture with Obli, you'll not be able to graduate.
Is this true?
Oh well, as for me, as long as you are determine to finish your studies, you have a great chance to achieve it no matter how many struggles you'll encounter.


I hate the fact that I can't express my thoughts orally.
I have to work on it.
Two weeks is over so I guess that's enough for adjustments.
Is it really enough already?


Loooooord, heeeelp. T.T


I can do this! I can do this! I can do this! <- I always think of it but when I'm in the situation already...


...
...
...
...


*not confident* T.T


This isn't me.
I must show what I've got.


Read! Read! Read!


#cheeringupthefreshyme

I Found Them In a Perfect Place

   When I received the letter for the Summer Bridge Program, I couldn't avoid to feel sad. As I was lying on my bed while holding the letter, I came to think of it that it might be His will in letting me be a part of the program. I know God has always a purpose so I decided to confirm and join the SBP positively. Since then, I became so excited about it; meeting new friends. Honestly, I didn't have the courage to ask other freshmen if they would join the SBP not until Juli Ann Sibi said that she's one of the bridgers. 

    Among the UP qualifiers in our class, only me and Ysabel were acquired to attend the SBP for others chose to study in USC and USJR and Scarlet has low proficiency in English only so she could just add it in her load because the SBP is for Mathematics.

    The opening program was a bit lousy yet inspiring. The teachers especially Mr. Salvador really encouraged us to try loving it, take it as a challenge and never think that it's hard.

    We were divided into two groups. The Section A comprised the programs : Management, ComSci, Math, Bio. The section B comprised the programs such as Mass Communication, Psychology, Fine Arts. Yes, I belonged to section B.

    I got nervous for I couldn't find where my classmates were on the afternoon to start the class. Thank God for I didn't surrender and looked for our room until I found it. I'm about to sit at the back but then I could see that there was no space at all. So I changed my way and sat beside that girl who I saw during the pre-enrollment. Her name is Hazel. She's really tall and pretty. I could see that she's really kind as well.

   On the next day, somebody was sitting on my seat and so I had to sit at the back. Hazel/Yanny and I were sitting together again. She went out of the room for a while and so I decided to transfer at the back most row in the classroom with Joey and Lizzete. Since then, we were always laughing because of Carl and Tara who are very playful yet intellegent. The following days were so fun even while answering the exercises. 

   Juli/Lizette introduced me to Joyce whose program is Fine Arts. I didn't saw her the other day on that week for she had an interview. Kimmy and Mary joined us during lunchtime. Since then, the nine of us became good friends. Everyone is enjoying with one another.

   Kimmy, Tara, Carl, (me), Joey, Mary, Joyce, Juli and Yanny. I so love our friendship. Thanks Summer Bridge Program in UP.

#lovingMathwhilemakingfFriends:)

UPinian

    I could still remember the day when our adviser told us that it is compulsory for the top ten honor students to take the University of the Philippines College Admission Test (UPCAT). I didn't hesitate to agree with what Maam Jean Puerto said for the entrance examination is free for those honor students. We were so busy before the UPCAT that we didn't get the chance to review the lessons well. We stayed at the house of Kulit's aunt in Basak. That was a wonderful memory actually. We just preferred to believe in stock knowledge. My schedule was on the last day. It was on the afternoon that's why I felt so sleepy and hungry. It was okay at first but as the time was running and my stomach was rumbling, I decided not to finish the Reading Comprehension. I missed 35 items there. I'm kind of depressed though but I accepted what happened for  I didn't put more effort in reviewing. And as the day for the UPCAT result was fast approaching, it was then that I realized how important that exam was. I prayed so much to Him. And yes, the day came. Elaene sent me a message that the result was on the website already. She said that I have to see it for myself. So I hurriedly went to the internet cafe shaking while calling out His name. That same afternoon, I went to the prayer room before going home. And when I opened the website, I saw my name there.Of course I was very happy. Although I passed, the result kind of made me sad. Why? It's because I didn't pass Mass Communication as my first choice program. I was thankful yet disappointed of myself. It made me think that I don't fit in that field. They told me that I still could get a slot in that program but I couldn't avoid to think negatively. But as days went by, I'm slowly recovering with regards to the result. After 3 months, my classmates and I received  a letter from UP inviting us to join the SUMMER BRIDGE PROGRAM because we got low scores. In my case, I had a low proficiency in Mathematics and ENGLISH. Again, that made me think that Mass Communication isn't for me. Yet, it didn't stop me from liking the program and so I still confirmed in Mass Communication for a slot. Fortunately, I got the slot. We applied STFAP for tuition categorization and swear it was not easy. We sacrifice a lot of things like energy, time, money. Well I guess it's worth it. Though the STFAP result is not yet posted in OSA, I availed the student loan. And yesterday, I'm a certified UP student already! :D Thank you Lord :)

#enrolled@UPcebu

Have Your Way

In times we don't know, in times when everybody is walking away from you, in times of  sudden changes, in times of bad news, in times of failures, in times of heartaches, in times of storms, you might feel like you're all alone but NO, you are not alone, He never leaves beside you. He is always there willing to help and guide you. Don't close your doors for some possibilities. Never blame Him for your misfortunes but instead thank Him for giving those challenges to you. Face it positively, that He will guide you along the way. So don't be afraid. Believe in Him. Trust Him. Praise Him. Put your prayers into actions and surely you'll find a better way to continue your life's journey.

Lord, I know that You know what are our problems right now in our family. Lord, I know that these are all trials. Lord, give us strength to face all these. Lord, help my parents. Lord, help my brothers and sisters. Lord, help me. Lord, please have Your way.

I love you Lord. With You in our side, we will pass these problems :)